Celebrate Their Life: Creating a Personalised Funeral with Humour and Heart
How to Have a Personalised Funeral or Memorial Service for Your Loved One
Hello, I’m Debbie, an Independent Celebrant based in Tauranga, and I know that planning a funeral or memorial service for a loved one can feel overwhelming, especially when emotions are running high. Over the past three years, I’ve had the privilege of helping families create personalised and meaningful services that celebrate the lives of those they’ve lost. Although funerals are typically solemn occasions, I’ve found that incorporating personal stories, humour, and warmth can truly bring the day to life and make the ceremony more memorable.
As a celebrant, my approach is about tailoring the service to the unique life of the person being honoured. It’s about recognising the essence of who they were and sharing their story in a way that feels authentic and fitting. In this blog, I’ll offer expert advice on how to create a personalised funeral or memorial service that reflects your loved one’s character, passions, and the positive impact they had on everyone around them.
Her favourite flowers and perfume were displayed on the beautiful coffin.
1. Share the Stories that Define Their Life
When it comes to planning a personalised funeral or memorial service, nothing is more impactful than telling the story of your loved one’s life. For me, this is one of the most important parts of the ceremony, and I always encourage families to take a moment to reflect on the moments that truly defined the person they’re remembering.
This might include their quirks, passions, and the events that shaped their life. As an Independent Celebrant, I specialise in weaving these stories into a ceremony that captures the heart of who the deceased was. Perhaps they were known for their sense of humour, love for adventure, or devotion to their family. By sharing these personal moments—whether through speeches, stories, or even a video montage—you can honour their memory in a way that truly reflects who they were.
I also believe that humour can play a powerful role in telling the story of someone's life. Although funerals are often thought of as serious occasions, I’ve found that a carefully placed, lighthearted story or anecdote can help lighten the mood and make the service feel more personal and uplifting. After all, your loved one likely had a sense of humour, and it’s important to celebrate that part of their personality.
2. Select Meaningful Music
Music is a beautiful way to personalise a funeral or memorial service, as it often carries deep emotional significance. The songs you choose should reflect your loved one’s personality or the memories that are most cherished. Whether it’s a song they loved to sing along to, a piece of music that reminds you of them, or something that resonates with their spirit, the right music can help convey feelings that words alone cannot express.
You could also opt for live music to give the service an extra special touch.
3. Include Symbolic Rituals or Personal Touches
Personalisation
His favourite model train, cap and farm boots were on display, along with flowers from his own garden.
One of the most meaningful ways to personalise a funeral or memorial service is by including symbolic rituals or touches that were important to your loved one. This could be something as simple as displaying their favourite flower, or something more involved like planting a tree in their honour. These rituals add a unique and meaningful layer to the service and allow family and friends to feel connected to the person being remembered.
If your loved one had a passion for a particular hobby—such as gardening, sport, or classic cars —there are many ways you can incorporate this into the ceremony. Perhaps you could invite guests to share stories about their shared experiences or bring along items that reflect this interest. I once had a family who set up a “memory table” featuring their loved one’s favourite books, a fishing rod, and photos from their trips. It was a wonderful way to honour the deceased’s passions and spark memories among those who attended.
If you're planning a funeral or memorial service in Tauranga or the Bay of Plenty, I’d love to help you create a service that truly honours your loved one’s life. Visit my website at www.celebrantdebbie.co.nz, or find me on Instagram @celebrantdebbie, Facebook Celebrant Debbie, or Pinterest Celebrant Debbie for more inspiration and information.
Let’s create a beautiful and memorable ceremony that reflects the life of your loved one.
